Human beings are given a choice in many things of life. Every man, every woman, boy, and a girl has to choose whether they are going to try to live right or not. There is another choice that we have in life; that is a life’s companion; your spouse. A young man or young woman stepping out of life has been given a right to make a choice. The young man chooses to marry and the young woman chooses to get married. But it is still a choice.
Human beings are given a choice in many things
Human beings are given a choice in many things of life. Every man, every woman, boy, and a girl has to choose whether they are going to try to live right or not. There is another choice that we have in life; that is a life’s companion. A young man or young woman stepping out of life has been given a right to make a choice. The young man chooses and the young woman has a right to accept or reject it. But it is still a choice. It is a serious thing when we go to choose a wife, a husband for the vows here until death does we part. A man in his right mind that’s planning a future should choose a wife very carefully. Similarly, a woman choosing a husband or accepting the choice of a husband should be really careful what she’s doing and especially in these days. A man should think and pray before he chooses a wife.
When choosing a wife, you better look at her character than reputation alone. Whether she is pretty or not that’s the only way to make a good decision.
God's way of approaching marriage
The bible has provided a clear way of approaching the whole issue, but instead of adopting them in as they are, we go for worldly beauty and lustful deeds that devour our very confession as Christians, little realizing that they cater to our tastes rather than to our spiritual needs. No wonder then we have more and more divorce cases all over the world as a way of running away from the reality. It is really deplorable that not only the common man but also some religious men have remained indifferent to the God provided way to marriage as an institution. It is a high time we pay proper attention to our biblical doctrines on and cultivate proper marriages.
The results of experiments and research carried on in western countries in the subject of marriage and divorce are very devastating and are sure to bring a ray of hopeless for the future of mankind.
How To Get The Right Spouse
When searching for your spouse, call upon the name of the Lord and involve God in this issue 100%. He is the creator of heaven and earth. Do not approach God with a pre-set mind concerning this issue. I mean don’t ask God for a life partner when you already have someone in mind. This amounts to hypocrisy and God cannot be mocked, “You will reap whatever you planted.” God wants us to approach Him with sincerity and an open mind. Go before Him in prayer and fasting without ceasing until your prayer is answered.
Always seek the perfect will of God in your life. The bible says “seek first the kingdom of God and all His righteousness and all the rest shall be added unto you.” God answers prayers at His appointed time (Habakkuk 2: 2-3). Most of the time youth give up easily at this delicate stage of making firm lifetime decisions. Remember the devil knows what you are praying for and he will always bring you a substitute to make you lose your vision. When praying for a life partner, make your specifications known to God. God will always guide you on the way forward. It doesn’t matter how this will come to pass, your obligation is only to believe in Him
Biblical example of marriage
We see a good example of Christian marriage in Isaac and Rebecca (Genesis chapter 24) It is good for those of the household of God not to marry from outside. See how Rebecca was married to Isaac; Abraham's servant devoutly acknowledged God. He proposes a sign, not that he intended to proceed no further, if not gratified in it; but it is a prayer that God would provide a good wife for his young master, and that was a good prayer. She should be simple, industrious, humble, cheerful, serviceable, and hospitable (look at this description of the expected wife to Isaac.)
When the steward came to seek a wife for his master, he did not go to places of amusement and sinful pleasure and pray that he might meet one there, but to the well of water, expecting to find one there employed aright. He prayed that God would please to make his way in this matter plain and clear before him. Our times are in God's hand; not only events themselves, but the times of them. We must take heed of being over-bold in urging what God should do, lest the event should weaken our faith, rather than strengthen it.
God chose a wife for Isaac
But God owned him by making his way clear. Rebecca, in all respects, answered the characters he sought for in the woman that was to be his master's wife. When she came to the well, she went down and filled her pitcher, and came up to go home with it. She did not stand to gaze upon the strange man his camels, but minded her business, and would not have been diverted from it but by an opportunity of doing good. Being satisfied that the Lord had heard his prayer, he gave the damsel some ornaments worn in eastern countries; asking at the same time respecting her kindred. On learning that she was of his master's relations, he bowed down his head and worshipped, blessing God. His words were addressed to the Lord, but being spoken in the hearing of Rebecca, she could perceive who he was, and whence he came.
We are to notice God's providence in the common events of human life. Laban went to ask Abraham's servant in, but not till he saw the ear-ring, and bracelet upon his sister's hands. We know Laban's character, by his conduct afterward, and may think that he would not have been so free to entertain him if he had not hoped to be well rewarded for it.
Seek the perfect will of God in your life
When praying for something, avoid diverting your attention to anything else and make God your only focal point. When praying for a life partner, avoid approaching God with a pre-set mind on your choice as a man or woman. Set your mind free and ask for the perfect will of God in your life. It’s only God who knows the best partner for you. The bible says that “He knew us even before our conception in our mother’s womb.” He had you in His mind before His works of Old (Proverbs 8:22-31). The bible says, “The eyes of the Lord are upon the righteous and his ears are open to their prayer. But the Lord’s face is against those who do evil (1Peter 3:12).” If you pray according to God’s will He will answer.
The bible says “we pray and don’t receive because we pray amiss.” God is a discerner of the intent of our hearts. He understands us better than we understand ourselves. God is never constrained by distance, tribe, race or any condition you may think of. The only sure confirmation that you’ve received your wife/husband is that God will confirm it to both of you at an individual level. “Take Note of This Statement” because it is at this point that most of our youth misses the mark.
There is need for proper discernment
The current trend in courtship and marriage is demeaning to both parents and the society at large. I have discovered that most of our youth fall in love without proper discernment of what it entails. Many of them cannot differentiate between “LOVE” and “LUST”. True and genuine love that leads to marriage is our core discussion topic. Many of our young generations have become victims of circumstances where some have been forced into marriage unexpectedly.
Many young devoted Christians are forfeiting their faith for husbands or wives without considering the consequences thereof. According to the Bible, Marriage is sacred and it was ordained by God Himself (Genesis 2:18 – 25). God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam while he knew no sin. God, as her Father, brought the woman to the man, as his second self, and a helpmate for him. That wife, who is of God's making by special grace, and of God's bringing by special providence, is likely to prove a helpmate for a man. See what need there is, both of prudence and prayer in the choice of this relation, which is so near and so lasting. This needed to be well done for life because it was a lifetime commitment.